yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
