It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
