It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
