yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
