did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
