I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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