This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
