yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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