please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
