Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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