when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
