if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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