Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
