Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
