Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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