so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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