I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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