I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
she peed on how many people?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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