i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
