Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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