If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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