we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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