Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Randomize
