I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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