She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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