I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
