Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
