Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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