I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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