if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
