guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
