So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
