So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
