Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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