Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
