dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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