is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I understand Curling. That high.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
