I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
COCAINE IS GR8
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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