i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
