I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
