She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
