Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
