You made me cry and you don't even care
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
