i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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