You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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