Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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