Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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