he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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