Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
