i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
